By Evan Mercer in mockumentary — 15 Apr 2026 "The first wave is modest, but unmistakable: the herd's spring migration has begun."
mockumentary "The tomb prepares the dead king for the next world, which the carts believe to be another parking lot. They cannot imagine anything better. They are, after all, shopping carts."
mockumentary "At the height of breeding season, mature office towers release vast clouds of paper gametes into the prevailing winds."
mockumentary "Their chairs had abandoned them to become a giraffe, but nature abhors a vacant workstation."
Sloane Occurrences "Despite its precarious construction, the adult office giraffe can remain in one place for several days. Its only natural predator is Facilities, which recognizes neither camouflage nor artistic intent—only twelve missing chairs."